Dear ,
Would you like a sneak peek into some surprising results from The Calm Mind Study?
Last April, I taught 200 people how to use a technique I created called Notice, Name, Relax, Release (NNRR). (NNRR instructions are at the bottom of this email)
Surprise #1: Giving yourself permission to let the emotions go is a game changer
“It is absolutely amazing to me that I never did anything like this in any of my therapy over the years. Controlling my emotions has always been difficult for me. Always felt out of control, as if the emotions controlled me. Giving myself permission to let the emotions go seems so simple, but it has honestly been a life changer.” (S.R.)
Can you relate?
Remember that Harvard study I told you about? Emotions only last 90 seconds if we don’t engage with them and just let them move naturally through us.
#2: It turns out that we are experiencing much more positive emotions than negative emotions.
“Doing NNRR is giving me the opportunity to be more aware of what I’m feeling. It has made me realize that I am very happy much of the time! I feel better after doing NNRR.” (D.M.)
One of the things that surprised me when analyzing the results of the study is that I thought people would have primarily “negative” emotions. But it turns out that we are much happier than we think we are!
“I noticed I didn’t want to let go of/release my grateful, satisfied, happy feelings. One thing I’m noticing is that when I’m feeling a positive emotion and I attempt to relax and release it, often what comes up is a different but still renewing/positive emotion. When I’m experiencing a negative emotion and I do NNRR, the negative feeling either softens or changes into a positive emotion.” (D.L.)
#3 The test group that had the most success with Notice, Name, Relax, Release was the group that set reminder alarms.
They set reminder alarms on their cell phone for 9 AM, 2 PM, 5 PM and 8 PM. I thought people would find these alarms to be annoying, but they loved them! It turns out that having reminders is helpful in the beginning to help you establish the NNRR habit.
“I wrote NNRR on my hand and set my phone alarms to check in four times a day. I also put a notebook next to my bed.” (S.R.)
“It’s really good to take pauses and notice how I feel. It does something just observing the feeling from outside. I was still stressed, but it goes from ‘I am stressed out’ to ‘there it is, the stress in me, look how it makes me feel.’” (C.B.)
If you were one of the 200 participants in The Calm Mind Study, thank you again. It’s crunch time now and I am working around the clock to finish up my thesis. Send me your good thoughts, when you have a moment. You know I love that stuff.
If you are new to NNRR, all you need to do is… (feel free to teach this to others)
1) Notice that you are having an emotion (or notice that your mind is talking).
2) Ask yourself, “What was I just feeling?” Then “peel the onion” and name one feeling at a time. Do not engage with the emotion, just notice it from a distance.
3) With each emotion, take a breath, relax and…
4) Release the emotion. Just let it move through you. Even super strong emotions only last 90 seconds.
“My body automatically takes a body breath whenever I release resistance… and this feels so good. So easy. So life-giving. It seems that the more I do this exercise, the easier it is to remember to do it. It feels more natural. Tonight, I taught it to a group of friends and they liked it too!” Feeling grateful for this NNRR exercise. It’s giving me some emotional distance from a mixed-feeling experience. NNRR is sort of becoming automatic throughout the day and I’m sure it helps me have more balance and clarity throughout the day. Thank you!” (D.H.C.)
Here are two videos I created for the Study that you can watch for more information on how to do Notice, Name, Relax, Release (NNRR).
How to NNRR (4 minutes): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TdDqqGzkUgCyDTAKEzf8FbO2BUmSwLMz/view?usp=drivesdk
Setting Alarms for NNRR (4 minutes): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vzJVXXApyCv9T36f8zYXzy_AHntu1FAj/view?usp=drivesdk
Thank you for all your support as I finish up my Ph.D. I’m closing in on the finish line now and it feels great.
Sending you love,
Rebecca @ Journaling.com
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